Men on dating apps:

1. First photo is a group photo? He’s the least attractive

2. Hats in every photo? Lebron James’ natural hair line

3. Dog/baby photos? Distraction from their face

4. Guys only take photos at weddings, cliché vacation spots, while fishing or car selfies
Unimpressed that you are an uncle, unimpressed that you took a photo with a sedated tiger in Thailand once, unimpressed that you gained 40 lbs after playing D3 basketball
Update:
All of you want Anthony Bourdain as your dream dinner guest.

The concept of a prompt asking an “or” question is so you pick one, not say both.

Starting a sentence with “swipe left if” is pointless because I’ve already swiped left
Levels of crazy:

Men: “swipe left she has crazy eyes”

Women: “swipe left he definitely has someone in his trunk.”
BOLD dating app choice: adding a photo of you next to two of the hottest, most famous actors rn and Tom Hiddleston
On the superhero note, immediate swipe left if you have a photo in a superhero logo tee*, even faster swipe left if it’s a tank top and you’re at the gym.

*Yes, this includes Clark Kent/superman for Halloween.
You all somehow excel at “dad jokes”? and have the same exact travel stories.
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Just wanted to run through some bios I saw while scrolling. Any time you want to call women crazy or wonder why some really great women are single take a look at these....
Ask two friends (male and female) to look a your bio before posting. Hold your shitty friends accountable.
Stop posting Mfing fishing photos
SoRrY fOr TrYiNg
wow, I just scroll for stand up material.
wow, I just scroll for stand up material.
wow, I just scroll for stand up material.
wow, I just scroll for stand up material.
Well actually....
he never responded after I said this
You can follow @jamieamalea.
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