If there is anything that Lagos taught me, it is that those who share money together have the best friendships. Behind every great wealth in Lagos is massive collusion. There are no “self made” rich men.

This is why there is a cap on entrepreneurship in that city. You can’t be seen to be too successful publicly without stepping on some toes. They will want to know who gave you permission, who you are working for or who you are working with.

One day, I was “summoned” to Polo Club and I refused to go. I found it ridiculous. Payment for our invoices were delayed for 18 months after that.

Lagos has several Mafias. Coming from Benin City where there were only two, I thought Lagos was the land of the free. I was soooo mistaken. There are even poor people Mafia in Lagos. Under the bridge at Falomo was a cult of its own.

First thing I couldn’t deal with in Lagos were the events you had to attend every weekend to show “loyalty”. People even travel to villages of ogas just to mark the register of support. Even children’s birthdays too. I found it an inefficient exercise in the allocation of time.

I gradually realized that I became an outsider. Even within my own group of friends were closer friends who did deals that made them closer and they were all always at these things. One day, a friend asked “what do you really do that’s so important ?” We never really see you.

It clicked that day. They felt I was making money and hiding it. I was showing arrogance and disrespect. That is another thing you can’t do within your circle in Lagos. You have to be humble in their midst. You can be arrogant outside but they cut you down to size then build up.

Sometimes also, if you don’t comply, they cut you down to size outside so that you can run back to them for help. Who are you to be chopping alone?

Interesting thing is that I found Silicon Valley to have this exact structure of friendships but without the sharing money part. They amplify each other so they don’t have to share. If you make money after I invest, I also make money. SV blow up. Lagos covers up.

The Lagos “cover up” to me is poverty mentality. I mentioned that Africans don’t understand Luxury the other day and someone was mentioning cabal haunts. They can’t even enjoy the money they have cornered properly. They still have to “code” enjoyment.

A friend just told me now that the humility bit is super important. “He doesn’t pick his phone” is why we have rubbish on the streets of Lagos today.

Maybe they all have to keep coding their enjoyment not to attract the attention of other sharks. I remember how those days, buying a bottle of Champagne at the club became a reason why people will want to find out what your scam is. Who are you siphoning from? Lagos is a mirage.

Someone asked after seeing this thread what the way forward should be?

The best thing you can do for yourself is:

1. Know where NOT to compete.
2. Never let them see you coming
3. Remain humble. It costs nothing.

By the way, Accra has all these things too and is worse than Lagos because it a smaller place.